Is a fan allowed to criticise?

One of my best friends said to me yesterday that my match report on the Doncaster game might "piss off" the coaching staff and the players. I hope with all of my heart that he's wrong, that is never my intention when doing player ratings or writing the blog.

I've never been one for booing at matches, hurling abuse at the players, accusing them of "not trying" or any of that nonsense. Similarly, I thought we were 100% correct to give the management team new contracts, I said so at the time and I still believe it now. Those contracts were hard earned, a couple of dodgy results doesn't change anything. A quick note here, I'll STILL be of the same mind if we lose on Saturday.

So onto the football.

Our problems at the moment are numerous, but players not trying, not being up for it and/or having a crap manager are not amongst them. Chief amongst our problems of course is that we've lost the guy who either caused all of our goals to be scored or scored them himself, and we've lost the best centre half pairing in the league. ANY manager is going to struggle to find a solution to those issues, and that's where we are right now, trying.

And so far, despite being severely depleted, our defence has held up really well. Lee Brown has been a warrior stepping into centre half, we've conceded only a goal a game in the last three as well as two worldies at Accy. Despite us stinking the place out at Donnie, we restricted them to very few openings. So defensively we've done really well, those lads deserve a huge pat on the back.

I'm not exactly providing earth shattering insight here, but it's elsewhere that our problems are most obvious. Many people have theories, the one thing we all have in common is that none of us work in professional football. You've got plumbers telling the manager to play James Ball, bricklayers saying play Ryan McLean from minute one, taxi drivers urging the recall of Ethan Sutcliffe, and publicans saying lots of other nonsense. Do they have a right to an opinion? I think they do, such as they are. Similarly though,  the people who actually make the decisions and whose job depends on the outcome, have the right to completely ignore them.

That's one of the reasons why football is the beautiful game isn't it? When Lee Brown passes it to Jack Currie, you've got fat blokes who have barely kicked a ball in their lives standing up to shout "Don't square it you moron!", and when he knocks it long a bespectacled badminton player who works in the NHS ("I played in the regionals once you know") telling him ""Square it you dickhead!". That's football, we ALL have a theory, ALL of us think we know better.

I'm no different, so here are mine on where we're at. It looks unlikely that either Joe or Ryan are going to be back soon, so the "deep lying" defence is going to persist. I've seen people suggesting we should play the new John-Jo bloke. I've nothing against that (I don't know him and have never seen him play) but from seeing him warm up, I'd be surprised if he's a speed merchant. My guess is whoever we play, we ain't gonna be pushing up to the halfway line to "pin them in" anytime soon.

So......what are our options. We COULD push Isaac into centre half (he played there as a kid) and play three in there. That would give us a little bit of pace/protection. Also, that would give license to Huss & Jack to bomb on a bit.

We COULD drop James Ball in there. I've never seen him play as a centre half but he no doubt could if asked. Once again I suspect that'd be as a three rather than a two.

We COULD play three in centre midfield. That'd be James Ball again, or even the lad who is best suited to it, Morgan Williams (whatever happened to him?). With that system, you'd be playing Kelly or Bugiel up top on their own.

We COULD do both of the above. Push Isaac inside to make a three, play Huss & Jack to provide width, play three in central midfield and play with two strikers.

All could and shoulds. Me? I'd play 4-5-1. 

I'd leave the back four as it is, they're defending well. I'd play an extra central midfielder ( James Ball), I'd play Omar on his own up top and I'd rest Josh Kelly (he looks to me like he's carrying a slight strain). Out wide, given the opposition are gonna be playing high, we are going to need pace to hurt them. We have two players that can scorch the grass and will scare the shit out of any aging full back. Josh Neufville and Aaron Sasu come on down. BOTH start for me on Saturday, with young lightening McQueen & James Tilley as first swaps.

We are going to be without the ball for lengthy periods at the weekend, let's not fight against it. We aren't going to be able to string twenty passes together and play through the thirds, that's ok. Our back line isn't going to get much further than ten paces ahead of the edge of our box, that's sensible. I think though that if we dig in, Armani Little rats like only he can, Bally plugs gaps, Jake orchestrates and Omar provides a focal point, our two quicks can get in behind.

We can win on Saturday. I'm not scared of saying who we are playing against either, we can beat MK. The key is having a plan and sticking to it.

Sorry (genuinely) if I pissed anyone off with my match report, it was simply how I saw it. I say this to the players and coaching staff, if you're angry, smash these on Saturday. Then come to the Alex, I'll buy the lot of you some beers. COYD.

My match Report: Doncaster v AFC Wimbledon

When a player has a bad game, in good football clubs we rally round. We chant their names on the terraces, behind the scenes they get a cuddle, it's always been that way. It's much harder when the whole team is as bad as they were yesterday. Who's name do you chant? who do you cuddle first?

Let's be clear here. The players will know it and the manager will know it already, but this was a truly awful performance. It was absolutely desperate with barely a single redeeming feature. We were passionless, totally clueless and what's more our football was utterly bereft of joy. Against a bang average opponent who had little to play for, we were outfought, outthought and outplayed throughout the whole ninety minutes. Our fans ironically sang that we were "coming for" the franchise, but I dread to think what the score will be if we serve up anything resembling this shambles.

We conceded what will no doubt be described (by us) as a poor goal after a few minutes. Defensively it wasn't great (are conceded goals ever?) but it was an interesting one to win the game anyway, a good case study if you like. You can see the goal here:

https://www.skysports.com/football/video/26947/13080346/doncaster-1-0-afc-wimbledon-league-two-highlights

You'll note that the left back skims it TO FEET into the central midfielder, he squares it to the rushing left midfielder, he makes ground before slipping in the striker who scores. It's not exactly Pep Guardiola or total football of the Dutch in the seventies, but at least it's football.  Even if you look closely, at the actual ball itself, there is no snow on it. Contrast that with us. There were aeroplanes from Leeds Bradford being diverted each time we briefly had the ball, we were completely lacking in the fusion and movement we saw earlier in the season. Quite why that has happened I've absolutely no idea, but we cut a very confused and confusing shape right now.

If we had a Kyle Hudlin up top, I wouldn't agree with the way we're playing but I could sort of understand it. If we had midfielders who bust a gut to get box to box, tall athletic lads who were within 10 paces of the football all game, I'd understand it. If we had a lightening quick front man who was bursting to get half a yard and then sprint away for flick ons, maybe. But we don't do we? We don't really have any of those things. Nor do we have pacey centre halves who can compress the play into the opponents half after we've launched it. We don't have a style of play nor coaches which are brave enough to bomb both full backs on. If we even had SOME of this stuff, I'd understand what we are trying to do, but we don't. We end up with our defensive line barely getting ten paces beyond the edge of our box, us launching it to give the ball away, then our opponents playing through our stretched lines and dominating the game. It is an utter shambles, and surely this is not what we are a talking about trying to do before we go out to play?

It isn't just the one game either. The home games against Morecambe and Crawley both had extensive spells of it, here it was practically the whole 90. Maybe that's it? Maybe it's just that here were behind for the whole game so we got progressively worse?

I don't know. I run a pub not a football club, but we need to change up our mindset and sharpish. There are already "tell me again why we extended the contract" murmurs amongst the fans, it'll get worse if we play anything like this at the weekend.

My match report. AFC Wimbledon v Crawley Town.

From inverted full-backs to false nines, football trends come and go. Some things though stand the test of time, they never change. "Goals change matches" is a cliche that's even older than me, it'll be as true in a hundred years as it was last night. On a cold and clear night under the Plough Lane lights, we rammed home the message.

The first half was tight, I thought we edged it but only just. Driven on by their raucous and strangely angry following Crawley were up for it, but we were better. New striker Josh Kelly was excellent, a real handful and there was much promise in his bustling performance. He had quarter chances himself then served one up on a plate to the other Josh, but somehow we fluffed the finish. I love Josh Davison for his industry but sheesh he has to score that. Then, I've seen punters thrown out of the pub with less force than Omar Bugiel was chucked to the floor from a corner, but we didn't get it. I guess this might have been payback for the Davis Keilor-Dunne one against us that Mansfield didn't get, this was at least as blatant a penalty as that one.

Into the second half and we continued to be the better team, even after young Balmer had gone the way of all our centre halves. Omar won an excellent back post header and Josh again couldn't convert from a couple of yards. I've more sympathy for him him here, the keeper flung himself across the line and the young fella will never make a better save if he plays till he's my age.

Then came the subs, the tweaks and the turning of the tide. Few in the stands would have argued with the substitutions before they were made, the captain and Ronan Curtis at least looked obvious and welcome moves. There is no question though that from that point on, Crawley wrestled the initiative from us and were much the better side. My only criticism of the management team on the night is that we didn't smell their goal coming before it was too late. The stench wasn't hard to pick up, it was completely stinking the place out a good five or six minutes before they scored. By then they were playing through our midfield at will, we should have gotten a message on and changed it up. Maybe to a more solid 4-4-2 without the diamond or even a 4-5-1, something. I'm afraid at that point we began to look a bit head scratchy on the sidelines in our response. 

The goal we conceded was a poor one, they always are under these circumstances. The difference of course was that when THEIR chance came, they took it. After that we huffed (I wouldn't go as far as adding a puff) and we were a beaten team long before the final whistle. Crawley were good in the last twenty in fairness to them, but we were getting progressively worse.

As people filed out I heard plenty of "that's the worst I've ever seen us play", what nonsense. What it was was as graphic an illustration as you'll ever see of the importance of scoring a goal. If we take ONE of our chances, we win the game. The trouble is that when you don't, the game can slip through your fingers quicker than sand through a tennis racket.

It hurts, of course it does. We need some operational/tactical tweaks for sure, but we are still a good team. We still have a good manager too, but like footballers they sometimes have an off day.  That's what happened here, an off day. The good news is we can change the whole mood on Saturday. COYD

A few thoughts after an absence.

I've been away for a bit, on the treatment table and unavailable for selection. I'm on my way back now though, in light training (can only down about six pints in a sitting) but it won't be long before I'm fit and firing again. So anyway, here's some of my thoughts from the last couple of weeks.

The managers new contract.

It's excellent news in my book. I've long advocated it (after admitting that I wouldn't have kept him on last season in a month of Sundays that is). This time around, he is quite simply a better manager. Forget all that "It's all down to Craig Cope/better players" stuff, that is a cop out for all of us Jackson critics. I don't do cop outs, I tell it like it is. The simple fact of the matter is he is now a much better manager than he was, and oiks like me were wrong to think/say he'd never make a manager while he had a hole in his arse. He's doing a fine job, we're lucky to have him. Skivvers, Rob & Bayzo too. My guess is Omar & Armani will sign with us next season, and it's because the manager is staying.

Losing Ali was a huge blow, but we had no choice.

If someone comes in the Alex and offers to increase my salary by 1500%, I'd be pretty interested. I reckon under those circumstances anyone's head would turn, I've no doubt Ali's was spinning like a barn owl once Ipswich started talking turkey. Fair play to the lad I love him, but my guess is that once he'd done the Cuba Gooding Jnr line from "Jerry McGuire", it was all over. We had no choice.

Josh Kelly isn't Ali. Then again, who is? (I know, Ali. Nobody likes a smart arse).

My hunch is that we are a long way as of yet from seeing what Josh Kelly is all about. I've only seen him LIVE the once, and didn't study him at all while he was at Solihull Moors. My impression from the one viewing is that he's obviously a talented footballer, has a good touch and that his movement is much better than Ali. That said our star man's main thing was not the intelligence of the movement, it was how quickly he got from A to Zee and how difficult it was to stop him getting there. Clearly our new man is nowhere near so fast and nowhere near so strong, he's a completely different type of operator.

My feeling is that Josh would thrive with little one-twos around the box, would gobble up being slid through little gaps in the defence with ten yard nudges. He looks like a clever striker in a kind of Dennis Berkampish kind of way to me. He isn't going to smash the doors off their hinges Ali style, he's more of a sneak through the gap just as they're about to close kind of guy. I don't think the Omar flick ones are really his cup of Yorkshire, he needs a little more subtlety to really shine. He ain't no Ali, but there's no shame in that.

The road to the playoffs can't be negotiated with SatNav.   

Folks who say "If we don't beat Crawley tonight we're done" are miles off in my opinion. The total lack of "on the beach" teams in L2 right now (mid table fodder who have bugger all to play for) means that everyone will beat everyone. The road will be rocky, we'll lose some games but we'll still go very close. My gut feeling is that if we're brave enough to go for the wins in games when it's 1-1 down the stretch, we'll get home with a point or two to spare. And there's no prizes for finishing 4th rather than 7th either. Anywhere in the top seven will do.

John Kymani-Gordon is a far better player than he himself realises.

While the jury may be deliberating about some of our new signings, I'm not in any doubt about this lad at all. He played a half of football right in front of me down the left side against Mansfield, he is an excellent footballer and I was very impressed. The other team obviously agreed, a fella kicked him over the corner flag in the second half. He came off after that, and hasn't really been the same since.

An observation on the kid. He is easily good enough to be a proper weapon at this level. He could cut inside to recieve possession, take it more on the half turn, hit it, dart in on goal. At this level he could be a Mo Salah type, he looks to me like the only thing holding him back is a slight lack of belief. It's hard to MAKE someone believe, but I'm pretty sure I'm right in saying that he is a proper footballer. Go get em son.

Crawley WILL NOT be a pushover. Neither will Doncaster.

I've read people on Twitter saying Crawley at home is a penalty kick. If it is, Ali is taking it. Look at the league table and you'd be forgiven for thinking they are miles behind us. They aren't. Four points behind us with a game in hand is nothing. They'll be coming to WIN the game, if they do they are well and truly in the playoff picture. In Dani Orso they have a slippery little bugger of a striker.

Donny are in my opinion THE biggest underperforming team in the league relative to their squad strength. They have some excellent players and should be much higher. They are just starting to show signs of clicking though (they smashed Grimsby 5-1 away on Saturday). 

Neither team will be a pushover. Four points would be an excellent return.

Anyway, enjoy the game tonight and at Donny. I'll be at both, see you there and COYD.

Why I'm glad that Ali Al-Hamadi is joining Ipswich Town.

League Two is brilliant, the EFL is brilliant. One of the best things about football in the EFL is seeing lads who you know are too good for the level, catching a glimpse of them before they move on up the ladder. It's good fun even when it's another teams players. The talents of the likes of Junior Tchamadeu at Colchester and Kamil Conteh at Grimsby shone like the neon light on the front of the Dog and Fox. It's fun watching as the scouts at bigger clubs eventually wake up to the fact that there's gold running through the lower league streams.

When it's your own players, it's even better. When I first started watching Wimbledon I marvelled at how good Jack Rudoni was. Just a skinny, mop-topped kid playing left midfield in a poor team. He was top goalscorer that year, head and shoulders our best player and so obviously on his way up you'd have to be blind not to see it. I couldn't believe (still can't) that only Huddersfield were prepared to pay the 865K fee. Ayoub Assal was another, to this day my favourite Wimbledon player. A joy to watch, a player that had that priceless ability to get you off your seat, on his way up.

Our latest is Ali. I remember going to a youth cup game just after he'd arrived. He didn't play obviously, but sat in a seat in the stands in front of me. I didn't bother him any (couldn't properly remember his name at that point) but couldn't help but notice how he looked like he was honed from granite, not the sort of lad you'd want a fight in a kebab shop with. When my daughter told me his age, I had to Google it to make sure. I've a son the same age, my lad could have five of his mates with him in that mythical kebab shop, Ali would smash all of em. He'd nick their chicken doners and air force ones with equal ease.

Then when he started to play, sheesh. Raw doesn't even go close to describing how much he has to learn, but the talent? wow. Pace, power, skill and the heart of a lion. He plays football like he's been told that tomorrow he's having a leg amputated. He sweats blood for the team, fights for every inch of grass. Ali is an absolute warrior of a footballer, one to see next to you in the trenches and be happy he's on your side.

And why am I happy he's going to Ipswich? Now? Because it's the right move for him, and longer term it'll be the right move for the club as well. I'm hearing from non HP sources that the deal might be split, this much now then this much if Ipswich go up. Plus a sell on clause. Why do I like this deal so much? It's the club he's going to really. Ipswich are a fine team (forget the result yesterday, they had 38:2 shots and lost 2-1!) and they play a style which will suit Ali down to the ground. They press high, and nobody hunts the ball like the Iraqi prince. And if he gets in the team (he will) they'll play him in on goal, Ali will score heavily.

The crucial thing for us (and partially I must confess for Ali as well, I love him) is that he PLAYS. My guess is that he will get into their team. Whether they go up or not, by next Summer (2025) they won't be able to hold onto him, irrespective of whether or not they are in the Premier League. Our man (for he will ALWAYS be our man) will go for big money, and our cut of that will mean we end up getting the " well North of 5 million quid" that he is worth.

No, this is a good deal. Does it damage us short term? Obviously, but I think with new lads Ronan & John (sound like a dodgy 70's pop duo) we can STILL get in the playoffs. We can definitely still be in with a shout right until the death, and at least come the end of the season we can keep our team together, go again next season.

That's the nub of it really. Ali is gonna be away in any case, whether we get promoted or not. Rightly so, the lad is destined for a different kind of football. He'll go with my blessing, he 100% deserves it. And when he does, I'll be crossing my fingers that he smashes it in East Anglia. He will, of course he will.

My match report: AFC Wimbledon v Mansfield Town.

Die Hard is a Christmas movie, don't let anyone ever tell you it isn't. Some people don't like it, I reckon it says a lot about someone if they don't like Die Hard, not in a good way either. I suppose one of the reasons folks might not be into it is they think it's too far fetched. How can ten blokes train their sub-machine guns on John McClane and not a single bullet hit him? Nobody dodged THAT MANY bullets they say, what a load of nonsense they talk.

They should have been at Plough Lane today. We dodged more bullets that Bruce Willis did in the whole series, and like the vest wearing New York cop, we don't care either.

Did we play great? Nah, and were we in all honesty slightly outplayed at times by Mansfield's ten men? Yep. Did we have the advantage of the totemic Aden Flint going off after twenty minutes and one of the leagues best players in Davis Keilor-Dunne being on the bench? Yep, but thems the breaks. Then, before we got the winner did we survive what looked to me an absolute stonewall penalty claim against us? Yes again, but we've had our share of ridiculous decisions.

So there it is. Omar scored a cracker, we let a soft (but well finished) equaliser in, we dodged a shower of bullets with the penalty claim, then won it at the death with a goal on his debut from Ronan Curtis.

Someone off the Mansfield bench jumped in the crowd for a ruck, the Mansfield fans sang "You're not fit to referee" (it was hard to argue) and Nigel Clough shook his head in disbelief.

We couldn't believe it either, but we got the three points. That's all that matters really, and if we'd drawn 0-0 at Wrexham, MK & here we'd have the same number of points we have from losing two and winning this one.

That's football. I felt (a little bit) for Mansfield, but thems the breaks. Yippy Kye Aye and all that stuff.

Prostate cancer and me. Get checked!

Through the brilliant work of charities like the Bob Willis foundation, I guess most of us blokes have by now at least heard of the prostate. We know the flippin thing can kill us if we get cancer in it, and we know it's common. Beyond that, in typical male fashion we know the best part of bugger all about it. We treat it a bit like the annoying bloke next door, ignoring it, not engaging with nor showing any interest in it, hoping we never cross paths.

Fortunately for most, this approach works (and please feel free to stick with it as far as Colin from next door goes, some people simply can't be fixed). Unfortunately though for some of us, ignoring our prostate doesn't work and from there you have a bit of an issue.

My prostate story began around Summer last year. I noticed that I'd had to start getting up during the night to go for a pee a bit too often, and it wasn't even only when I'd drank loads of pints. I'd read somewhere that this could be a prostate alarm bell, so I decided to get tested (good move this as it happens, probably saved my life).

The doc explained that the old finger up the bum was a bit old school (not the school I went to but you get my drift) and these days it was all about blood tests. That suited me fine, so they took some blood and tested my PSA (prostate specific antigen) level. Apparently your prostate emits these thingies a bit like a buoy bobbing around in the ocean sending out bleeps. Not an exact science by all accounts, but they can work out roughly what it should be according to your body size and from there make a determination.

At this point I'm going to digress a little and talk about the prostate itself (I knew bugger all about it previously). Inside your tummy you have a bladder, that's where the fluid is stored before you have a pee. That bladder is connected to your todger by a thin tube which sounds like a region in Russia. Where that tube connects to your bladder, the prostate is like a washer which fits around the tube, like a little doughnut (think Jacob Rees-Mogg). It's about as big as a walnut (ditto). It's primary function (it seems to me) is to make the milky stuff that goes into sperm. If you're a doctor and I'm wrong here, now you know how Johnnie Jackson feels reading my blogs about football every week. Anyway, if you get cancer in the prostate it can cause it to swell and nip your pee tube. This means that it becomes difficult to fully empty your bladder etc, and you need to go to the loo more often.

Anyway, back to my PSA test last Summer. I scored 645 and apparently it should have been 512. They sent me away for a few weeks, told me to cut down on booze, sex and spicy foods (some were easier than others) and come back in a few weeks. Next time up I scored 828, Houston we had a problem.

From there in hospital terms I was a bit like Terry who drinks in the Alex, being that I was in there more than the fella supposed to be running the gaff. I had my "flow " tested ("like a racehorse"), had one of those things where you go inside the big X-ray tube (MRI is it?) and a biopsy. The last one they go in and chop bits of your prostate out for analysis. What was all of that like? Probably not as bad as you're imagining, but pretty flippin close to be honest.

Anyway after the MRI tube thing I had "a 58% chance" of it being cancer. After the biopsy it became 100% and it was in two places in my prostate, confirmed, cast iron. They give you a thing called a Gleason index which measures how aggressive it is. Mine was 3:3 which apparently is the equivalent in terms of aggression to around a Jake Reeves. He can get riled up, but by and large he keeps it sensible. You don't want a Vinnie Jones or an Armani Little on the old Gleeson score obviously. Most important of all though is that I was stage two, pretty early. It starts at one and goes to five. Once you get into the fours it gets decidedly dicey, at five you need a few snookers. 

My options? They were firstly do bugger all. Monitor it every few months and be ready to act if Jake gets out of the wrong side of the bed one day or if someone kicks him. That didn't overly appeal to me, having it hanging over me like. Secondly it was chemotherapy. I've seen my Mum go through that, you don't need me to explain it you. I didn't fancy that overly either. The third option was to have the prostate removed, I went with that.

If you have your prostate removed, you won't be able to father any more children. I'm 57, I reckoned I could put up with that OK. Apparently it will effect sexual function too. Doesn't completely kill you off, but you'll no longer ejaculate and even getting a boner takes a bit of practice. None of the above are ideal, but under the circumstances I felt I could live with the last one the best. If I was 27 not 57 it might have been different, but I'm not so it's not.

So anyway last Thursday I had the prostate out. Three and a half hour operation, two days in hospital. I had a catheter in for a week (tube coming out of your todger and connected to your bladder, pee bag strapped to your leg). However bad you imagine this is, double it and add three. When I got home I was as sore as fuck, and I thought the recovery would be long.

This morning though (8 days after the op) I had my catheter out. I'm still a bit tender in my guts, but I can walk around no problem and if you met me you wouldn't have a clue there was owt wrong with me. I'm thinking about going to the football tomorrow, I've just had a box of KFC for lunch and I'm feeling strong. I wouldn't try and lob any drunks out of the Alex or have a tear up with an MK fan, but I'm definitely improving fast (I wouldn't have a tear up with a rival fan anyway but you get my point).

I've got some scars, I'm a bit sore. I can't have anymore kids & any dreams of being a porn star (as if!) are in the bin, but at least whatever happens I won't die of prostate cancer.

I feel lucky, so so lucky. Thankyou to all of the folks at the hospital who helped me out, you were brilliant, thankyou so so much. You can be lucky too, go get yourself checked out. That's what I've done ever since my diagnosis, urged people to get checked out. If one person reads this and thinks, "Y'know what?" then I've had a good day. 👊❤️